With James’ second birthday passing fortunately the questions about baby number two have stopped. However the same question “when will you stop breastfeeding” keeps popping up. I know most intentions are good but it still doesn’t make them any less annoying. Also if you’re wondering the answer is, I have no idea. I intend to stop when he is ready. I find it a little peculiar that no one has yet to ask me what have I learned? Or what would I do differently. I wanted to share those answers with you today.
There are a few things that if I would have known about before hand, would have made life so much easier. But there are also things that I have learned from just rolling with the punches motherhood brings you. One thing I know would have been useful were crock pot freezer dinners. Thinking back on those first couple weeks we ate a lot more fast-food than I’d like to admit. I wish I would have thought to make those a head of time.
Being a first time mom I worried so much. I let my anxiety and fears take over. I was so worried about taking James out as a newborn we missed a lot of special events with family. I was so worried my marriage suffered because of it. Date nights came to a halt and family time outside of the house was non existent. Now looking back I can see how ridiculous those fears were.
One reason for my anxiety was breastfeeding. Breastfeeding James has been a roller coaster of a journey. The more comfortable I got with breastfeeding the more comfortable I got feeding him outside of the house. But early on the thought made me so uncomfortable. James wasn’t always EBF (exclusively breastfed). Early on we tried to bottle feed. Honestly it was awful. James HATED the bottle.
I kept pumping but the only time I would try the bottle would be for special occasions when I knew I wanted to have a glass of wine or a beer. James would fight the bottle so hard we ended up wasting more milk than he was eatting. I really believe I gave up too quickly on that. I think if we were able to bottle feed more I would haven’t been so anxious to have a night out with my husband. Or even take James to a dinner or baseball game. I definitely plan to push the bottle a little more next time.
Looking back I almost laugh at all the times I should have taken my mom’s help with open arms. I remember always telling her ” no don’t clean that it’s okay. No don’t cook I got it.” My mom could see the new mom doubt and worry in me, taking over and consuming me. She didn’t let that stop her. Now I wish I would have kept my mouth shut and just let her help me. I owe her so much.
The last thing that I will try to tackle differently is Cosleeping. At first James slept in his bassinet like a good little baby. But around 2 months old we started the bad habbit of falling asleep while breastfeeding. I know. All the experts say not to let the baby fall asleep on the boob…but as a new mom I didn’t know any better. At that point I was running on survival mode. Now that I am a seasoned mom I think I could tackle sleep training a little better.
After two years at this mom thing I can truly say I am confident in my abilities. My husband and I don’t plan on having another anytime soon however you can never know for certain. What I do know is next time around I will be more confident, less anxious and hopefully more prepared.